Goodbye blogger...hello new blog!!

I want to thank you all for visiting my blog here! But as I mentioned in my last post--Eden no longer gives me consistent access to my blog, so for practical and security purposes, I had to move it. Please click HERE to email me for the new blog address. On my new blog site you will find many new things:

*Stories about my life in Eden, my new kitten, my summer of baseball, and more!
*A way to subscribe to have my posts delivered automatically to your inbox!
*Also a passworded page that has more detailed information about what is going on here in Eden!

Send me an email for my new blog address and then you can get started exploring my new blog. Prepare yourself for insights into my life here, my heart, and why I love what I do! See you soon on the new blog!

Of Censorships and Of Blogs...

Censorship and privacy laws are things that are spoken of often in hushed tones. Here in Eden--I get to live them. :) There are certain sites online that are now being censored more and more; which talking in lay-man's terms means also that other sites are being monitored more and more. One of the most recent sites (and currently the most annoying) that is being censored is (drum roll please)... our very own blogspot.com, ie. my (and many other people's) blog.

Thus, I can post blogs from my email or from the settings, but I can never again (here in Eden) look at my blog... Hmmm, I have a feeling that this isn't going to work very well. Thus I am soon going to be unveiling my blog via "wordpress.com". For security reasons I will not put the website address here, but please send me an email or keep your eyes open for an email from me announcing the address to my new and improved blog. :) Thanks for sticking with me as we now travel to wordpress... ;)

Every Day Here is a Priviledge

My former team leader last year here in Eden stated that "every day here is a privilege..." and that is so true. I have been honored to be able to live walk, meet, pray for, and share my life with people here in Eden who otherwise may never have met a Christ-follower. As I have been pondering this blog entry on how "every day is a privilege", I came across a letter written by Nate Saint, one of the five who was killed in 1955 by the Aucan tribe, this letter speaks to my heart:

Nate Saint's Christmas Letter (December 18, 1955)
“As we weigh the future and seek the will of God, does it seem right that we should hazard our lives for just a few savages? As we ask ourselves this question, we realize that it is not the call of the needy thousands, rather it is the simple intimation of the prophetic Word that there shall be some from every tribe in His presence in the last day and in our hearts we feel that it is pleasing to Him that we should interest ourselves in making an opening into the Auca prison for Christ.

As we have a high old time this Christmas, may we who know Christ hear the cry of the damned as they hurtle headlong into the Christless night without ever a chance. May we be moved with compassion as our Lord was. May we shed tears of repentance for these we have failed to bring out of darkness. Beyond the smiling scenes of Bethlehem may we see the crushing agony of Golgotha. May God give us a new vision of His will concerning the lost and our responsibility.

Would that we could comprehend the lot of these stone-age people who live in mortal fear of ambush on the jungle trail . . . those to whom the bark of a gun means sudden, mysterious death . . . those who think all men in all the world are killers like themselves. If God would grant us the vision, the word sacrifice would disappear from our lips and thoughts; we would hate the things that seem now so dear to us; our lives would suddenly be too short, we would despise time-robbing distractions and charge the enemy with all our energies in the name of Christ. May God help us to judge ourselves by the eternities that separate the Aucas from a comprehension of Christmas and Him, who, though He was rich, yet for our sakes became poor so that we might, through His poverty, be made rich.” [Emphases mine]

Every day here in Eden is a privilege; the adventures, the homesickness, the assurance that tomorrow will be yet another non-ordinary day, the opportunity I have to stand in the gap for those who have not yet heard...there is no place I would rather be. I am honored to be here and count every day here as a privilege.

Earthquake: A lesson in being prepared

Since the Japanese earthquakes earlier this year, one of my friends made a point to have a small earthquake bag prepared in case there would be an earthquake here in Eden. So I also packed a small bag. But it is not always easy to prepare and as time goes on, you forget about your bag and it gets its contents removed as it is used for something else. Because by this time you just know that there will not be an earthquake any time soon. In many ways, I assumed that could have also been the pattern of the first Century Christians who were waiting Jesus' return--they had their "bag" (metaphorically speaking) ready; but as time went on and we moved into the second, third, and now twenty-first century the urgency to be ready has somewhat faded.

God brought this to mind this week by shaking the foundation here in Eden, literally shaking it up with a 5.4 earthquake waking me up at 7:30am with windows rattling, floor moving, and the building swaying. My first thought was: I need to get dressed--I need to get ready, but like the story of the ten virgins (Mt 25), you cannot get ready while something is going on--you need to be ready beforehand. And so after our first aftershock of 4.9 I prepared my earthquake bag again and took it with me to my next meeting where I experienced a 4.8 earthquake. It was at this time that talk was starting in the city, rumors were flying, and people were beginning to ask themselves how they could be ready for what was to be a 8.0 or 10.0 earthquake later that night. Many people fled the city, others (including myself) slept at friends' house who live on the first floor, and some merely made sure that from 9pm to 11pm (the time of the rumored big earthquake to happen) that they were outside away from their apartment buildings.

God was shaking things up, and it was not in vain. Throughout the course of this week I have been able to have amazing conversations with people about what it means to be ready and God laid on my heart to talk with friends who were over at my house about how we too can be ready not only for the "next" earthquake but how we can get ready for Jesus' return--and that it is only through accepting Him, having faith (not based on our works but based on what HE did for us), and making God our first love. God used this earthquake to teach us about how we too can prepare our "bag", our hearts, for Jesus' return. So...with my earthquake bag repacked by my bed, I ask you to pray that God continues to stir up hearts (I'm ok with no more literal earthquakes for the moment) and that He teaches us how we can be ready for His return--something that will effect the whole earth.

Easter ushers in our love-relationship with God

As I was talking with a friend over here, the meaning of Easter hit me in a new way. We were talking about the how she had one time felt bad that she started to eat and then someone said: "let's thank God for this food...". Afterwards I mentioned that to God--it is not important whether we say "thanks" at the beginning, at the end, or even how it is not a sin if we don't say it at all. I then shared with her that God is not concerned with how well we follow the rules, but instead through Christ He invites us into a love-relationship with Him that is governed by grace. As I continued and shared with this friend--God was also speaking to my heart. Christ's sacrifice on the cross made way for us to live in a love-relationship with God that is no longer based on the "rules" because if we break one of those rules--then we have broken them all. Instead, we are free to daily live and worship God by loving Him in all we do, does this mean we will lie, steal, or murder--NO! We won't do these things because we love our Father. This Easter I am reminded of what I have received through Christ's sacrifice, an opportunity to love enter into a grace-filled love-relationship with my Creator. I hope that you too will be once again awed at the love of the God this Easter. It is like one of my girls said today after she accompanied me to church for the first time, when asked about what she thought about it--she said, "God loves me...He is glad like I am glad today, He loves me." :) I can hear Heaven rejoicing with me right now as she is starting to understand and receive the love of Christ and it happened this Easter. Happy Easter to everyone!

Dreams Come True

I have seen God as the Master dream-weaver recently. He has done the imaginably more in my life, which also gives me hints of what is yet to come...I smile just to think of it. While here in Eden, I have been faced with some dreams that are "almost...but not quite". (Where I thought something was "just right for me", only to discover that God had something else--something different in mind.) My apartment is a good example: it seemed perfect until I realized that cockroaches can crawl the walls (particularly the one above my bed), that my neighbors informed my landlord of my whereabouts, and that having your every move watched by others--actually makes you feel less safe--thus I knew I needed to change apartments! So, without a new apartment--just a dream of one, I told my landlord that I was leaving and gave my ten day notice. Day 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, and 5 all passed without an apartment (day 5 was hard as I saw horrible apartment prospects, but luckily enough I caught 5 cockroaches between the hours of 3am and 5am--inciting me to continue the apartment search). But then along came day 4! One street above where I was currently living, the cutest, cheeriest, most "homey" little apartment came across my path (or shall I say, I came across its path), and with prayer--I knew that it was to be mine! God took the "almost" out of my dream as He gave me a NEW apartment that had everything I liked in the old apartment--minus everything I didn't like. And then God used that in my life to encourage me of what He will continue to do in the group here, in the city and country of Eden, and in my own personal life. God is the master dream-weaver, He takes the "almost" out of our dreams and gives the immeasurably more!

Last Tuesday I had the opportunity to share about some of the ways that God recently has encouraged me to dream and step out in the freedom that He has given me. I shared that God has given me the (1) freedom to love--regardless of whether that love is returned, I can be free to love not expecting anything in return; (2) the freedom to be me--no longer having to live up to never satisfied image of the "ideal" or perfect Diane, God has created me to be me and to experience the joy and adventure of discovering and living out all that He has placed in me; and I shared (3) the freedom to abandon our dreams into the hands of God--thus with God as our partner we can trust Him as He directs us and we are no longer solely responsible to realize our dreams--now we can trust Him. It was wonderful to be able to share with the group here and to be able to hear people's dreams and pray with them afterwards. I am getting just a glimpse of the Greatness of all that God dreams for the people I'm with, for this land called "Eden", and for this girl in whom He delights...and God's dreams are good! :)

The Weekend God turned everything to Spring

We gathered together, we played, we prayed, and the 30 of us met with Jesus. It was a beautiful time because just as the frost and the snow melted off from the sidewalks and the rooftops--the coldness, closed-ness, and frost also was melted away from the hearts of those who went. Each of them (including me!) had a fresh touch from our beautiful, wonderful, Creator God. Thank you for your prayers and continued prayers that God will continue to touch, melt, and open up heart here in Eden! One morning, during our "morning encounters with God" we were given the 'assignment' to look around at nature and see what God may want to reveal to you. As I gazed outside, although I am neither a psalmist nor an artist, I felt God tugging at something in my heart. He showed me the melting snow and how when it is melted it not only reveals what is underneath that had remained buried for so long, but also it has the opportunity to have new growth in the places that were previously iced over, in so many ways--it is the same as with our hearts and I saw that weekend God do a "melting" of the snow, frost, and ice that people may have come to the retreat with, I saw Him melt it so that He can bring new growth. And in many ways--this is what I feel is coming to Eden (in the physical and the spiritual): Spring, God bringing new growth. In some ways as writing this--it reminds me of when Spring came to Narnia for the frist time in 100 years...and to that I say--God let it be so here as well!

Accidents, Apartments, and VISAS...Oh My!!

Life comes with it's surprises, which is a good thing, otherwise it might get pretty boring always knowing what will happen next. But then again, there are some surprises that we would not have wished for. I can actually give a few examples for what I mean here. Two weeks ago Friday, I was getting into the backseat of a taxi on the right-hand side. Before I knew what was happening, boom-de-boom-boom! Our taxi (which was stationary before--the motor hadn't even been turned on) was currently in a ditch about 100-200 feet from where I had tried to get in. I was sitting in the taxi--but my hat didn't make the ride, it was back at the scene of the accident where I hit my head on initial impact and then the jolt of the car came and hit me in the back, all within a second (or so it seemed). It was pretty traumatic, I didn't know what to make of it all--and my taxi driver and everyone who asked me how I was...they didn't know what to make of me: the American girl who shed an occasional tear still sitting in the back seat of a now totaled car. But I can honestly say that God protected me BIG TIME. I walked away (which had I tried to get in on the left-hand-side of the car I probably couldn't have done) with only some soreness and a small bruise--nothing broken or fractured. And I am glad to be able to say now that I haven't really felt any discomfort or soreness for a week now! Thank you Jesus! Yet even though the accident was not planned nor wanted, I saw God's hand in and through it. He had even prepared me the night before and that morning by bring worship songs to mind. He is good!

A few surprises came with my apartment--it is everything that I could have wanted (and had prayed for) and more! Big enough to have people over, near by others that I know, and in a safe location! It was perfect! Yet...I also had a surprise there too, I realize that upon moving in, although I am living alone...I am not quite as alone as I had hoped. There are a few big (BIG) bugs that come out from time to time, they crawl, they scurry, and I think one of them just scurried into my bedroom (which means I doubt I'll have a very peaceful night sleep). They are apparently a common bug here in Eden, although I admit--they are not too polite--they just invite themselves in, often through the drains. Their name: (I wince even while writing this) cockroaches. I think I announced myself to my neighbors this afternoon as I saw one and tried to kill it with soapy water (really works!) but it moved--hence my little announcement of my presence to the neighbors (word to the wise: they are not killed by women shrieking). So tomorrow--I bleach EVERYTHING. And hopefully they will realize that not only are they no longer welcome here...but that if they return, I will kill them. (That announcement--I would love for them to pass along to whomever they might know!)

So yes, surprises are not always desirable...but they make life interesting--I now have two more life stories that I didn't have before. But it is all worth it, because I have my VISA which is my legal permission to live in Eden. "Worth it?" one might ask, "you think it's worth it to live in a land that may have cockroach parties while you are sleeping, you think that is all worth it so that you can live there...?" Yes, yes I do. You see, Eden is not made up of car accidents or cockroaches; it is made up of people, many who have become my friends and it is worth it to live with cockroaches (not that I won't try to get rid of them--I will!!) so that I can spend more time with my friends here as we walk together on this life-journey that God has for each of us, this journey to His heart.

Challenged by the Christ-dependent lives of those who have gone before me...

It has almost been one week since I arrived, and I am wowed at how God has met me every step of the way. It is beautiful to serve such an amazing God! I look forward to tomorrow as I meet up with some old friends and I look at some apartments. Yet tonight as I am getting ready for bed--I am challenged both by the words I read today and the movie I saw. And as I try to put myself into the plot of the story...I feel like I fall so short.

Tonight some friends and I watched the movie "End of the Spear" the story of five families whose fathers/husbands were killed while trying to befriend and share love with an Ecuadorian tribe. It was a beautiful depiction of what is truly valuable in life and it challenged my own life in so many ways (most of all I am sure that I am not yet aware of). In it there were many strong people and as I think about it, they were strong because they knew where their strength came from. This movie brought up many questions. "Could I," I wonder, "be like Nate Saint, Jim Elliot, and the other men who forsook their families and missed seeing their children grow up in order to have an opportunity to share Christ's love with this indigenous tribe? Would I have been as strong as Nate Saint's wife and freely let him go knowing that I may never see him again? After the men had been killed by spears, would I have been able to go and live with the tribe as Rachel Saint (Nate's sister) and Elizabeth Elliot (wife of Jim Elliot who was killed) did? Would I have been like Kimo who so eagerly accepted the love and sacrifice of Christ or like Mincaye who allowed guilt and shame hold me back from accepting God's gift of forgiveness and abundant life?" I do not have the answer to all of these questions but I do know this: that I always want to accept what God has for me with child-like glee, never being either a step ahead of God or a step behind Him, but always in step with where He wants me to be; dependent on Him as my source and my strength.

I am delighted that I am here in Eden because (as with the Saint and Elliot families) I, for many, may be their first contact with God's love. The real question is: is it worth it? YES!!! Would I do it again? In a heart beat!! “Show me, LORD, my life’s end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Everyone is but a breath, even those who seem secure" (Ps 39:4-5). And Jim Elliot, one of the five who was killed, stated: "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." I know neither the length of my days nor how fleeting my life is, thus I came. Although I could continue to ask: "could I have been like any of those in the movie?" I do not know that God is asking me to be the next Jim Elliot, but instead--He is asking me to be the Christ-dependent Diane, and that I can be whether it resembles Jim Elliot's, Nate Saint's, Nate's wife's, Nate's sister's, or anyone's life. I know, and am confident that as I am dependent on Him--He will give me the strength to do all that He has called me to do and to be. Lord, let it be so!

My arrival

As I walked out of customs area and through the exit gates, I heard shouts: "Welcome Back Diane!! Whoo-Hoo!!" And at that moment I knew: I had arrived. According to the dictionary, arrived is: "having reached a place at the end of a journey or a stage in a journey" or in my case reached a new chapter in the journey. My flights were good, filled with anticipation and expectation for this next leg of the adventure of my life walk with God. During the flight: I watched a few movies ("Morning Glory" was great!), had fun talking to people on the same flight, and I got through to Eden without a single hitch. My bags passed without having to "re-shuffle" weight at the airport, my seats had plenty of extra room for me to sleep, and my ticket and VISA had no problems. But most importantly--I had arrived!

This year there is a new theme that the team is incorporating in all of our large group gatherings. It is: "Dream Big and Freely for God". When I first heard that, I gasped because that is exactly what God had given me for the country of Eden, the city I'll be in, and the students I'll be investing in; God gave me: (Eph 3:20-21), "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." AMEN!! I am so excited to be a witness to all that God wants to do in Eden this year and this next season.

Being here makes me realize that I not only have returned, but that God prepared the land ahead of time me to come at this time. I have arrived, and it feels good! :)

The Impact of an Influencer...

Influence. Just this past week I found myself in Seaside, Oregon surrounded by pastors in the Oregon Network as we talked about what it means to be an influence. According to the dictionary, to influence is –noun: the capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or produce effects on the actions, behavior, opinions, etc., of others: He used family influence to get the contract. —Related forms: in·flu·ence·a·ble (adj); in·flu·enc·er (n) When I think of the word "influence" the word "impact" also comes to mind with it often. I think in so many ways--they go hand-in-hand. Those that we influence, most times--we make an impact into their lives. That is the life breathing, giving, out-flowing of discipleship that can happen naturally in the context of genuine relationships.

Today in church, I had the opportunity to share a little more of my story, how God has lead me to where I am, and how God has enabled me and impassioned me to be able to share HIS story. It was beautiful! I love being able to encourage people and share with them how God has had me share and encourage them to share with people around them.

I have been impacted and influenced this week by the thought of how God has placed His most precious story in clay vessels, who in, and of themselves, are ordinary--but because of the story inside of them, they are stunning. That...that is the type of clay vessel that can influence and make an impact on others. It is a clay vessel that is willing to live up to and stand up to the precious story of God's love given through His son which impacts generations. I cannot wait to see how those I invest in, influence, and hopefully impact for God will then turn and become life long influencers making purposeful disciples and impacting every life they touch. That is what I aspire to--Lord do it!

Compelled by love from a God who loved me first!

I just talked with one of my girls tonight who is in Eden--we shared laughs and stories and talked about how we are excited to see one another again! I am going back for her and for others like her that I met, I am compelled by love because I have a Great big God who loved me first! I am still expecting big things from God and am grateful to Him that He left the 99 to get me the 1, and I am excited that I can partner with Him (just as others partner with me) that I too can go for the 1, for the 7--the girls that became my friends as we shared our lives together. Sharing sorrows and joys, we studied God's word together and prayed together--I am compelled to go because He first came compelled by love for me!

His Word never comes back void

I just heard through a friend that one of the people I met in Eden (who fell beautifully in love with Jesus) just said that she prayed with another in Jesus' name and that the seeds are still growing even if we are not there to water them, others are taking our place, I am so excited!

A year without internet

Now-a-days people muse and wonder, "what would it be like," they say to themselves, "what would it be like, to live in a land without internet...?" I no longer have to muse and wonder about this, but I have something that the musers and wonderers don't have; I have an answer to the question. Welcome to Eden! Where the internet is scarce and where living in a land without internet is...well, it's different.

This past year living in Eden has been good, challenging, and exciting. There have been too many adventures to retell, too many changed lives to count, and too many glimpses of God to go back to a 'regular' life. God was in Eden. There He brought people to Himself and showed them His love. In Eden lives were changed, they had a new outlook, a new glimmer, and they became new creations desiring and pursuing the things that the Father desires and that the Father pursues. In Eden, God moved people--including myself.

I apologize that my time in Eden was not documented well in this blog. I am in the United States now before heading back to Belgium (and beyond!) and all I can say is that living in a land without internet is...difficult to keep in contact with people, it's a change from the pace of life and from the amenities I'm used to (i.e. daily internet usage), it's...different. Sorry, more updates from this time on...

A new path through the snow: spring

Something new has been happening in Eden; the snow has melted, the birds are singing, and the sunshine (70 degree weather) has come out!! Not only were the birds and the flowers and sunshine out in the open air but the snow has receded in most all places and green grass is starting to appear. After a long winter, spring has come. What shall we do about it? Have a picnic and celebrate!! :)

Christmas in Eden...

Never before have I seen so many outdoor Christmas trees decorated and displayed. With a light dusting of know on the ground, it makes living here in Eden like walking through a Winter Wonderland. Except I never would have expected that it would be here where I find the Christmas trees and little images of Santa Claus. As one friend and mentor put it, it is strange to see that here Christmas is celebrated without meaning or even foreknowledge of its true meaning.

Soon we will be sharing the story to students in hopes that they might come to understand, believe, and claim the story for their very own, pray for us in this! Christmas, Christ's miraculous birth that brings life to...everyone who accepts him.

Surgery

6am: My brother Kevin and I got to the hospital to visit with Mom a few minutes before they took her out. She shared with us after we prayed around her bedside that Ps 52:8-9 were the verses that were really standing out to her. "But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God;I trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever. I will praise you forever for what you have done; in your name I will hope, for your name is good. I will praise you in the presence of your saints."

6:30am: Preparation for the surgery

9am: Get a call that surgery has just started

10am: Get a call that the tumor is "VERY benign!!" NO CANCER!! :)

During this no-news waiting-time, it was hard to wait, but there was a group, waiting, praying, itching to hear news...

2pm: Surgery done, Mom survived and is in recovery!!! :)

6pm: Mom has moved to ICU from recovery.

7pm: I finally get to see her and say that I love her!

God brought her through--thank you all for praying! God is able!

My Mom's pre-surgery

Here I am in Portland, OR at the hospital waiting as my Mom finishes up her angiogram, her surgery is tomorrow. She is doing really well! And I am so glad that my parents were able to fly me out here to be with her! I arrived on Friday and will be staying through some of her recovery period to be able to help out. At the moment, I don't know quite all of what to expect. But I do know that I have seen the hand of God in the little things leading up to this surgery. The fact that my Mom got headaches, usually there are no symptoms to alert the doctors or patients. The fact that when I was first told about the news, my passport was still in the Passport office of Eden being processed so they were able to quickly put an "Exit - Entry" visa into my passport. Also the dates that I wanted were at the price that I had prayed for! God is good, and He is here; in the big as well as the little things!!

Some News...

I just got a phone call from my Mom last week, she said that she has a brain tumor. And the doctor's recommended that they do surgery on it...now. It's a little un-nerving, I don't quite know what to think, but I do know this that God is in control and that even here in this little unknown brain tumor, He is taking control, thank you for prayers during this time. Depending on flights, school, and all the other details, my parents have said that they would like to fly me out there to be with them at this time, I'd like to be there for them too.

Russian to French to English to...?

Learning Russian is not the easiest language in the world. Here in Eden, there are two main languages: Russian as well as the native language. At a presentation done by myself, some other Americans, and Mike (whereas I played the part both of an American as well as a Belgian) the teachers also presented the benefits of the language program. At first the Language staff at the school was talking about learning BOTH languages at once, but I think that we'll just stick with Russian at the time being.

In my Russian classes, I am grateful that I have a knowledge in French. Why?, an inquisitive person might ask. Well it is not because of the similarities of the two languages. Instead it is because of our language teacher. In an effort to teach us Russian, she doesn't know any English, so she instead translates the Russian words into French whereas Mike or I will translate the words or instructions into English and upon need the words will also be further translated into either Chinese, Korean, or Spanish. It is indeed a multi-lingual class!